What happened (fiction)

I remember when we were together,
sitting on your couch, playing games, and talking
then everything changed,
and you dump me on my birthday.

You said that we were just growing apart,
and frankly I agree with you.
Due to you always making fun of my friends,
taking my money for gas,
get your own gas you lazy moocher.

I am glad to shop at target,
and glad to have good friends/

You know though I am happy that we're over,
well happy in a crying sort of way,
crying wishing you would just get out of my life sort of way but it's ok.

Now I see where you were going with the fact we were growing apart,
and you know what?
Thank God.

You were the most whiny blah I have ever met
by just throwing a fit like a Tasmanian devil when you didn't get your way,
and you know something else?
Your wardrobe costs more than my car.

Now you are going around telling everyone that you dumped me
I guess that makes you an empowered individual
Wait did I say empowered individual
I meant you are a human genie.

I just have 1 last thing to say to you and that is,
I hope you made the right choice,
because we are through forever.